A parenting blog. If you're not interested, this won't be interesting at all.
I'll note what I'm personally glad I bought / gifts that helped / things worth knowing.
Whether or not you're expecting a baby, the gift part may help if someone around you had a child and you're stuck on what to give.
If you expect a catalog of clever gadgets, you may be disappointed.
I'm writing for people like me who knew almost nothing about parenting until birth (especially soon-to-be fathers). Mothers may find some of it useful too. In other words: if you've already researched parenting heavily, this may be obvious — please read with that in mind.
Not parenting-specific — we had one before birth — but after the baby I was glad all over again. Time, stamina, and effort get stretched thin; imagining life without a washer-dryer is scary. Clothes, towels, mats — I was shocked how much laundry grows when one more person joins the family. If you don't have one yet, gift-money budgets from birth celebrations should go here.
Winter got so dry I bought a fairly solid one on Black Friday. The baby's skin trouble settled (baby oil alone wasn't enough; winter dryness seems almost abnormal-weather-level, like summer heat). Sleep quality improved too — very effective. My wife and I were also about to wreck our throats; that cleared instantly. For households with babies, this may be essential.
I bought one around two weeks after birth and regretted not having it from discharge (~day 7). About ¥5,000, but I'd buy it even at 10× — essential. Babies often only sleep when held; holding wears out your elbows and tires you, and both hands busy means no chores and frustration builds. A sling helps a lot. Putting them in often got them to sleep. You shouldn't use a sling for hours straight, but we used it several times a day for ~30–60 minutes. Every morning at 7 I put the baby in the sling for a ~30-minute walk, come home, put them on the bed; they usually cry after ~10 minutes, then back in the sling for 30–60 minutes while I cook, mop, clean the bath, do laundry. Without it I'd do chores while ignoring a crying baby and the guilt would be brutal.
"Cook" for me means easy stuff — Cook Do, frozen pork-miso soup veg sets you just throw in a pot with miso, fish you can leave on the stove — so mostly doable with the sling on.
A rocking chair to help the baby settle without crying. Same purpose as the sling, basically. Hoping something would calm them, electric high-low chairs were pricey so we rented (~¥8,000/month) — that failed completely; returned after a month (renting was the right call). Then we tried a bouncer and it helped somewhat. Max ~20 minutes though. Putting a crying baby in does nothing. Useful when we have no choice — eating, or when an adult needs a shower before the bath. Bought for under ~¥8,000.
A sterilizer my wife bought before birth. Wash with detergent after a feed, stick it in, press a button. People often use a microwave; this is very convenient. Make milk, feed, burp, wash bottles — about every two hours in the newborn phase, mentally exhausting, and while you're anxious about hygiene, "did I wash this well enough?" is a real cost. Having this gives psychological ease — "just use this and we're fine." Finishing in about an hour helps too.
A wide, no-step mat for the living room. You can co-sleep on it. Sleeping in the same room as the baby made me too on-edge, so we put a Gootarag in the living room and co-sleep there (then switch with my wife). Unlike a crib there's less fall worry, and you can play there in daytime (tummy-time practice etc.) — handy. About ¥60,000 and it takes space, so I can't casually recommend it — but if you'd spend several tens of thousands on a crib, jumping on this may be the better mid-to-long-term choice.
When we told an acquaintance about the birth, they immediately sent a big LINE Gift of wet wipes. I thought "that's a lot" when it arrived — but you use tons (not only poop — spit-up etc.). They have a daughter and know parenting — that gift felt informed and really helped. I resolved that when friends have a baby I'll smartly send wet wipes. From the giver's side too: not expensive, practical, low social pressure. Same for diapers — they size-out easily, but you use more than you imagined before birth, so diaper gifts help. If giving, ask about stock and size first. Newborn sizes especially size-out in about a month.
My mother brought these; when we had no time or energy to cook, retort meals saved us several times. And not only retort — when my mother and mother-in-law visited they cooked batches ahead, which of course helped enormously.
If friends have kids in the future, I'd send those two.
I briefly mentioned this in an earlier blog: the channel Houboku Oyaji walks every morning from one month after birth, and I've been copying that — walking every day without fail since month one.
Bottom line: morning walks are highly recommended. Getting up and going right away may be hard, but personally I think you should.
Wake up, change diaper, feed, apply baby oil, walk ~30 minutes.
Above all, I stabilize mentally from the morning walk and sunlight myself.
Also: curtains open by 7 a.m., living room lights off by 7:30 p.m.
(So adults take turns eating in a dark living room.)
On that channel the baby sleeps straight from 8 p.m. to about 7 a.m. — honestly a rare, very smooth case.
A very filial baby.
Also, with my wife's policy we aim for exclusive breastfeeding — about 80% breast / 20% formula. Only past two months could we start making formula-free days.
So with exclusive breastfeeding, unlike formula, supply isn't always adjustable — I assume you'll wake at least once at night. (Maybe later they'll sleep through.)
Anyway, like everything in this blog: "do X so Y happens" often doesn't hold. Over-expecting morning walks can cause struggle. Parenting is so individual that you shouldn't blindly trust others' advice either — trial and error for your own child is the only way.
Before walks (before one month), even one hour of night sleep was a win; otherwise wake, breast or bottle, hold — a brutal stretch.
From month one we walked and I logged sleep daily; looking at that, after about a week of walks they slept roughly two hours.
Around two weeks, falling asleep at night got smoother. From then, after evening bath and feeding, they'd fall asleep between 8:00 and 8:30 p.m.
Still: after sleep onset, sit ~30 minutes with them asleep in arms before moving to bed (putting them down right away made them cry).
Then some nights wouldn't sleep, but basically ~3 hours from about 9 p.m. to midnight, feed, sleep in arms again, then about 1:00–3:00. From 3:00 sleep was less stable; often they wouldn't stay in bed until morning.
Around two and a half months (~70 days), after a ~8:30 feed they'd sleep fairly soon, and without long holding — ~10 minutes then to bed. Then roughly 8:30–2:30 (6 hours), feed, then ~3:00–6:30. Writing this at three months, they finally slept 8:00–4:00. A feat.
Compared with month one, huge progress — and a big physical relief.
Tricks weren't only walks — raising AC temp, humidifier, layering clothes, changing how we hold — but I think the biggest was morning walks building a biorhythm.
Next, temperature management like layering had a big impact (in winter, clothes that felt fine at 8 p.m. often weren't enough for morning cold — layering lengthened sleep).
Then the humidifier. Those three variables were very effective for longer sleep. I recommend a room thermometer/hygrometer and trial and error.
That's all.
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